Often the reason I struggle to trust God is that I view Him as small and limited.

In a way, I feel like my lack of trust is a defense mechanism. Could it be that I don't trust God because if I don't believe for something and then nothing happens, then I haven't been let down, but if something does happen then I can happily attribute it to God?

I don't know what this line of thinking means other than that my faith is small.