I feel like this quote explains my heart.

"Evil is real- and powerful. It has to be fought, not explained away, not fled. ..You have questions on your mind. I'm glad you do. Perceptive people like you wound more easily than others. But if we're going to work on God's side, we have to decide to open our hearts to the griefs and pain all around us. It's not an easy decision. A dangerous one too. And a tiny narrow door to enter into a whole new world. But in that world a great experience waits for us. Meeting the one who's entered there before us. He suffers more than any of us could because His is the deepest emotion and highest perception." Christy, page 95