No fun, nursing home.

Today I went with Mom and her guitar students to the nursing home. The little old ladies bobbed their heads and sang along as we attempted to play some music. A nursing home is a great place to take anyone learning to play an instrument or wanting practice in performance, because even if you don't sound stellar, the residents love it. My favorite moment was when we didn't have the chords to "We Wish You a Merry Christmas", the residents began to sing it without us.

When my family first moved to North Carolina, Mom started bringing us to the nursing home. We adopted a grandma, someone who had no one to visit them, someone who needed friends to visit. We didn't have any family here so Mom decided that it would be a good idea, I guess. The first grandma that we had was "Grandma Johnson" and the second one was "Grandma Smith". I always have had this terrible sinking feeling when I go to the nursing home. I just get so sad when I see how people can become, if that makes sense. And I feel so sad that they are just left there, instead of cared for and treasured in their old age. I am certain that there are reasons for people to be there, and I am certain that their being there can't always be avoided. We played for them, accepted requests and when it was done, I gathered my guts together and went out to talk to the residents. I probably hugged 15 little old ladies. 15 treasures. 15 women who have seen and done incredible things, and now are just sitting and waiting to die. One lady held my hand forever. She was so tiny and precious. Another lady, named Miss Dorothy was very excited to tell me all about what she'd gotten for Christmas. She told me that she was from Boston and that she was hoping it would snow for Christmas here, just like it did up there. She told me that her husband of 'I forget how many years, but I should be so lucky' died last year, and she was lonely. And then I had to leave. I always tear up when I leave. But I blinked my tears away so I could smile my biggest at the residents sitting by the door. That's the way it always is. My heart breaks as I leave. Earlier I wrote about caring for widows. I'd always begrudged going to the nursing home because I know the emotional distress it will cause me, but today it took on a different light. It was no less difficult, no less causing me to stare death in the face, no less smelly and full of strange sounds, but today I realized that it is something that Jesus would have done. Jesus would have walked into that nursing home with a big smile on his face and he would have held those little old people's hands, listened to their words and treasured them.




currently listening to: The Cafe Hotel Presents Winter Songs