Stress does really crazy things to me. Or really, just makes me eat strange things.
I just ate a waffle + frosting + whipped cream. I am now drinking water to detox, but man, it was good.
Yesterday Greg talked in church about authenticity. He read a quote from the paper that said that we have a "cultural obsession with a perfected surface". I cannot stop thinking about that. Greg talked about how when we encounter God, our smallness is exposed, and our identity becomes that we are loved by God.
I wish that I could step out of my neurotic self, and embrace who God has made me to be. I wish that I could remember that what is taking place in my heart is what matters so much more than my looks or the way I appear to people. I wish that I could be genuine and authentic, loving people in a real way. And I wish that whatever I did wasn't somehow all about me. I am so self-centered, and so inconsistent.
I suppose I will turn those wishes into prayers.
Oh Christ, evaporate my false identity. Let me find myself only in you.
Monday, November 24, 2008
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