I am not my own, and God is a God of surprises.

I am about ready to blow my brains out due to education classes. I really hate them and I think that's funny because I love working in the high school.

I still am not sure 100 percent what I will do when I graduate, and that's okay because it's only now the beginning of October. I've also realized that this is only for a year.

For some reason I always forget how much I love high school kids and how excited I get when I just walk into a high school. I walked into the classroom to meet my cooperating teacher on Wednesday and I felt surrounded by electricity. I was so excited! As the kids came into the classroom, I got even more excited. I love my kids. I've met only half of my students, but I absolutely love them. My kids are funny and bright, and because they're only Freshmen, I'm still taller than most of them. Then I became afraid. Afraid because Northern is whole 30 minutes away from the UNCG campus/ Glenwood. Afraid because what if Northern offers me a job; it's not a very diverse school. Afraid because what if I love it; I'm not big on change.

Today though I was thinking. I have two classes of CP students. My CP (college prep)English 9 kids are really overlooked at Northern. Northern is a very idealistic school, which I love, but there isn't much room for lower preforming students since the high school wants to be in the top 10 high school in the US. There are many honors classes and AP classes but not all kids are ready for those higher level classes, so they're put in CP, or as we call them at Northern "pre-honors". I have patience for those kids, I want to work with those kids. I never really thought about the fact that someone has to love those kids at Northern too. The kids that have been displaced and pulled from wherever to boost diversity. For now, that person is me. I am really excited about it. I can't really say, but I think that working at Northern would be a great fit for me. So my plan is to work hard and see if I don't get a job offer in May. I am praying about it. God will open doors where He wants me to go, just as He's opened my eyes and heart to the kids around me. We'll see where I end up and instead of worrying, at least today, I am excited to dig right in, see how God will use me and see where He puts me for next year. 30 minutes isn't that long of a drive, after all.



real time: 4:32 PM
currently listening to: Secondhand Serenade
currently reading: Geoffrey Chaucer's Troilus and Criseyde


PS. I have had to change my profile due to the fact that I now also have a blog that my students can see. It kinda makes me sad that this blog too has had to become a bit more starched and professional. But... go Nighthawks!

http://emilyjackson.blogspot.com/